Onward

I know, I know, I’m late to the ship, again. But can I just say this: I HATE when movie trailers don’t do the actual movie justice! And I mean that in both directions – I hate when movie trailers aren’t as good as the movie (i.e. “Onward”) but I also hate it when the trailers make the movie seem better than it actually is (i.e. every Christmas movie on Netflix). I remember a bunch of my friends saying that “Onward” was SO GOOD, but I also heard that same review for “Brave” and “Cars 2” and I was less than impressed with both of those…sorry not sorry.

Onward | Disney Movies

HOWEVER, I ended up watching this movie twice within a 48 hour period, which is something I haven’t done since the 3rd grade when I watched “Mulan” everyday for a week. This one’s gonna be a rave, so instead of going off in paragraph form, imma do my usual thing and give you a list. Bon Apetit:

Reasons to watch “Onward”:

  1. Every single person with a sibling can relate to the “I can’t believe how embarrassing it is that I’m related to you feeling”. And if you have NEVER felt that feeling it’s because YOU were the embarrassing one. It’s just like that saying in college: “Everyone has a weird roommate, and if you didn’t, it was you.” Because of this super fun fact about life, this brother dynamic is all too accurate and also incredibly heartwarming.
  2. This Elf Mom is quite frankly the DOPEST mom ever to be committed to an animated film. Not only is she a friggin Mighty Ass Warrior, but she is so supportive of her kids using magic to bring back their deceased father, aka her late husband, that I honestly think she needs to be nominated for an Oscar. How freaking chill do you need to be to encourage your boys to see their dad AND still communicate well with your also (oddly) chill boyfriend, Mr. Fabio Police Centaur Man.
  3. Chris Pratt. Need I say more.
  4. The names in this movie were absolute perfection. Guinevere is hands down the best name for a van. Corey the Manticore….brilliant. And Barley and Ian is like Bert and Ernie 2.0. AMAZEBALLS.
  5. Without spoiling this movie too much, the scene where Ian sits on the cliff with the bottom half of his dad and starts looking at his list, was quite honestly the most moving animated scene I’ve watched since the furnace scene in Toy Story 3. IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW.

Long story short, if you have a sibling, a mom, a dad, a board game, a van, and/or a manticore, I HIGHLY suggest you watch this movie. It can ONLY make your day better. I promise.

Truthfully Yours

PFP

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